Although nowhere are they explictly stated, there are always three major assumptions made about Ay:
I - He was the son of Yuya and Thuya and therefor brother of Tiye and Anen.
II - He was the father of Nefertiti, and therefor father-in-law of Akhenaten and grandfather of Ankhesenamen.
III - He had a hand in Tutankhamen's untimely death.
It is my hope that this little biographical essay will address each of these assumptions.
The family of Yuya and Thuya hailed from the southern city of Akhmin. They were very influential and may ormay not have been of foreign decent. Yuya and Thuya had two confirmed children: daughter Tiye and son Anen. Ay is often considered to be the elder son of Yuya and Thuya for two reasons: his name is very similar to Yuya's and because he seems to have inherited Yuya's titles, particularly "Master of the Horse." Anen, although recognized as a son, does not seem to have inherited any of his father's titles. He served in the priesthood, most notably as the Second Prophet of Amun. So it is likely that Ay was in fact a memebr of the Yuya-Thuya family, and hailed from Akhmin.
It seems that Ay's wife, Tey, is the mother of Mutnodjmet. Mutnodjmet is called "The Sister of the King's Great Wife, Neferneferuaten-Nefertiti." Therefore, it would seem that Ay and Tey are also Nefertiti's parents -- or are they?
Like Yuya before him, Ay never mentions being the father of a queen, but he is the father of a Queen (if he is in fact Nefertiti's father). While Thuya delighted and announcing to the world that she was the "Mother of the King's Great Wife" in the tomb she shared with Yuya, he husband said nothing about being the "Father of the King's Great Wife." Instead, he simply held the title of "God's Father," which many feel should be translated as "Father-in-Law of the God" with the God being Pharaoh. Ay held this title too, which suggest he was a father-in-law of a Pharaoh, Akhenaten. So it seems that Ay probably was Nefertiti's father. But was Tey her mother? It doen't look like it.
The only Nefertiti-related titles Tey held were titles describing her as a 'nurse' of Nefertiti. Titles such as "Nurse of the King's Great Wife" and "Governess of the Goddess." To this author and many others, this seems to imply that she was not Nefertiti's biological mother, but she did raise her. Perhaps the situation went something like this: Ay's first wife (whose name is lost to us) dies either shortly after or during the birth of his eldesy child, his daughter Nefertiti. It would be perfectly natural for a noble family such as Ay's to have a wet-nurse for the baby, but in this case she would need one, since her mother has died. Tey joins Ay's household as his daughter's nurse. The two eventually wed, and Tey gives birth to a second daughter, Mutnodjmet. Therefor the two girls are half-sisters, which is a perfectly acceptable explaination of Mutnodjmet's title of "Sister of the King's Great Wife." And Tey does imply that she is Mutnodjmet's mother.
Before rising to height of power after Tutankhamen's death, Ay was an influential and seemingly loyal official at Akhenaten's court in Amarna. He was the "Fanbearer at the King's Right Hand" and even had a complete version of the Hymn to the Aten carved in his (unfinished) lavish Amarna tomb. Was he the devoted civil servant he seemed to be, or was it all an act?
Either way, as soon as the boy-king was teetering on the throne, Ay clearly helped arrange the reversal of Akhenaten's policies. By the second or third year of Tutankhaten's reign, Amarna had been abandoned, the old gods had been restored, and Tutankhaten and Ankhesenpaaten (Ay's last surviving granddaughter) were Tutankhamen and Ankhesenamen. These hardly seem like the actions of a 12-year-old who grew up in Amarna under the rays of the Aten.
Ay was known as "the Eldest King's Son" during Tutankhamen's reign, which was obviously honorary because the teenage king couldn't possibly be the father of the elderly official. Along with the General Horemheb and several other officials (including the King's friends General Nakhtmin and the Treasurer Maya), Ay guided the young king's restoration policy througout his reign. The government seems to have run smoothly until the Pharaoh's 9th regnal year, when he was about 18-years-old.
Ay's relationship with the royal family had never been weaker. Under Amenhotep III he had influence as the queen's brother. Under Akhenaten as the queen's father. But with Tutankhamen, his only link was being the queen's grandfather. Besides, he was old. He had probably already lived past his life expectancy. His power only existed while Tutankhamen depended on him and other officials for advice. It seems only natural that as the boy-king grew to manhood he would have begun to make more and more decisions for himself. Perhaps he was turning out to be too much like Akhenaten. Perhaps he had ideas all his own that were not favored by his powerful officials. At any rate, his sudden death remains suspicious to many, and although it seems possibly -- if not likely -- that there was some sort of foul play in Tutankhamen's death, it seems a moot point to point fingers now (In Ankhesenamen's letter to the Hittites, the line "I am afraid!" seems to point to something not being quite right in the palaces of Egypt). If a murder took place, it is difficult to conceive that Ay didn't at least know a little about it, maybe even gave it tacit approval. Who knows?
Ay became Tutankhamen's sucessor, arranging the burial after the 18-year-old king's sudden and unexpected death. After Ankhesenamen's failed attempts to obtain a bridegroom through the Hittite Letters, it seems that Ay married his greiving granddaughter, and thus legitimized his claim to the throne. The 20-something Ankhesenamen died during his reign, whether from foul play or some other cause is not known. Tey becomes queen, and is portrayed as such in Ay's tomb. Although there is some evidence that Ay intended Nakhtmin (probably a relative) to be his sucessor, it was Horemheb that succeeded him as Pharaoh. Horemheb spent his reign restoring Egypt's empire and erasing all mention of Akhenaten, Smenkhkare, Tutankhamen and Ay. So it came to pass that Ay, who many think may have been -- at least in part -- responsible for Tutankhamen's death, is all but forgotten, while Tutankhamen is the most famous name to come out of Egypt, with the possible exception of Cleopatra (who wasn't even Egyptian, but I digress).
Ay's Five Names as Pharaoh:
Horus name: Tekhenkhau
Nebty name: Sekhempehtidersetiu
Golden Horus Name: Heqasekhepertaui
Prenomen: King of Upper and Lower Egypt, Kheperkheperure-Irimaat
Nomen: Son of Re, It Netjer Ay